“I’m not all the way sober, but I’m Chicago sober. Which means I still drink and maybe do a drug, but when somebody asks me about it I get defensive.”

Beckett Kenny

“Look, there’s nothing funny about severe Alzheimer’s. But I think we can agree that it’s a convenient disease for an old German person to have. I’m like, ‘Oma, tell me about the war.’ She’s like, ‘What war?’ … Well played.”

James Mwaura

“My friends are trying to give me dating advice, right? They’re like, ‘Maybe you should start playing hard to get.’ Which is difficult when you’re very easy to get.”

Natasha Collier

“I do use she/they pronouns. Because biologically I am a woman, but internally I feel like the entire cast of the Scooby-Doo gang.”

Emma Dalenberg